


Fear Factor

by clgfanfic



Category: Soldier of Fortune Inc.
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-11
Updated: 2012-11-11
Packaged: 2017-11-18 09:58:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/559721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clgfanfic/pseuds/clgfanfic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>a post-"Broken Play" story</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fear Factor

**Author's Note:**

> Originally published in the zine Don't Ask, Don't Tell #3 under the pen name Koppie.

As soon as the chopper was on the ground, Margo, then Matt, scrambled out the door. Together they helped Benny Ray out while C.J. helped Chance carefully ease out of the pilot's seat.

Within moments the special ops team was surrounded by American Air Force medics, who emerged from the darkness at a run, two of them pushing wheelchairs, and one a gurney.  They immediately took over with Benny Ray, helping him into a wheelchair and taking him away.

Chance waved off help at first, but three steps later his knees buckled, Matt and C.J. just managing to grab him before he fell.

"Hey!" the major called.  "Over here!"

Two of the medics rushed back, directing Chance into the second wheelchair, rolling him off as well.

"Anyone else hurt?" the medic with the gurney asked.

Matt shook his head, saying, "No, thanks."

"Sir, if you'd please follow me," the young woman continued, "I'll take you to the ER.  The doctors are going to want to check all of you over."

"Great," Margo sighed, but she was too tired to argue anymore.

"Sorry, ma'am, it shouldn't take too long," the medic replied.

The three operators followed the airman into the base hospital.  Behind the large building they could see the house lights, dotting the Italian hillside.  Once inside, they were each escorted to three gurneys lined up in a large room and asked to take a seat.  Curtains were drawn to provide each with privacy.  Moments later, nurses and doctors arrived and the examinations began.

"Look," Matt snapped at the captain who was skimming his chart, "I want to see my injured people."

The petite, red-haired woman met his demanding gaze.  "Mr. Walker's in radiology, but you can see Mr. Riddle if you'd like."

"Thank you," Matt said gruffly , gesturing for her to lead the way.

"Uh, Major," the doctor said, amusement dancing in her eyes, "I think you might want to get dressed before you start parading through the ER.  Don't you?"

Matt's cheeks turned bright red and he dipped his head, his bluster evaporating like fog under strong sunlight.  "Uh, yeah.  Do you, uh, have something I could borrow?  Besides these damned gowns?"

The captain glanced over at the pretty African-American nurse who was trying hard not to smile as she cleaned up.  "Nancy, why don't you grab the Major some scrubs – extra large."

"Yes, ma'am," she grinned, then ducked out of the space.  She returned a few moments later, handing Matt the green-colored pants and shirt.  A pair of white terry cloth, flip-flop house slippers sat on top.

"Thanks," Matt said, offering her a wan smile.

"Sorry 'bout the shoes, sir.  That's all we've got for the patients."  She grinned, then ducked back out again.

Shepherd quickly dressed, his back to the captain.  When he was ready, he turned and gestured for her to lead the way again.

With a sigh she pulled back the privacy curtain and led Matt down three curtained spaces, then pulled back the fabric hanging around another cubical just far enough for him to enter the small space.  Matt stepped in, finding Benny Ray seated on an examination table, stripped down to just his briefs.  The vision made Matt's breath catch in his throat, but he forced the reaction away and moved closer.  The sniper had one leg stretched out on the table, a nurse working to wrap his swollen ankle.

"Hey, boss," the sniper greeted with a tired smile.  "Everybody okay?"

"I think so," Matt replied, his brows drawing together as he noted the large, dark bruises spreading across the sniper's chest.  "Christ, Benny Ray, what happened?"

The sniper grinned predatorily.  "Like I told ya, sir, some local thought he could pick my bones – popped me twice at close range."

"Darned good thing you had that vest on," the nurse said without looking up from her task.  "You'd've been dead for sure without it."

Matt paled slightly, his skin going cold as he remembered the sniper's words in Bosnia.  Close.  So close.  And it had been his orders that had put the sniper out there all alone.  It had almost cost the man his life, and for what?  They'd failed.  Well, Margo and Chance hadn't, but he had.  He'd read the situation wrong from the beginning, leading Benny Ray and C.J. right into the jaws of death.

"Nothin's broken," Benny Ray said, reaching up to lightly press his hand against his side.  "Just bruised my ribs real good."

"Not to mention the muscles," the nurse added.  "It's going to look like someone tried to tie-dye you in another day or two."

Benny Ray grinned.  "Better that 'n dead."

"I couldn't agree more," the pretty young woman said with a quick smile.  "I'll be right back with your bath."

The sniper's cheeks turned rosy and he dipped his head, looking up at the women, hoping he might charm his way into a real shower, but she was quick, slipping out before he had a chance to make his case.

When she was gone, Benny Ray leaned forward to check the wrap on his ankle, which extended from his toes to just below his knee, but he stopped, sucking in a sharp breath.

"Benny Ray?" Matt asked, taking another step closer.

The sniper looked up at the major, his face going pale within the span of a couple of seconds.  A moment later his eyes rolled up and he slumped forward like all of his bones had suddenly been removed.

Matt lunged forward, catching the sniper before he toppled off the table.  The weight of the man pressing against his chest sent a shiver of desire straight to his groin, but it was forgotten in the fear that squeezed the major's heart.  "Nurse!" he bellowed, trying to get the sniper sitting up again.  "Benny Ray?" he questioned, giving the man a little shake.

A moment later the nurse was back.  "What happened?"

"He just passed out," Matt said.  "What's wrong with him?"

"I'm not sure," she said, setting the small plastic tub down, water sloshing over the side and onto the floor.  With Matt's help, they laid Benny Ray down on the examination table.  "I'm afraid you'll have to leave," she said, pressing a button on the wall.  A moment later a doctor stepped into the curtained space.

"I'm sorry," the colonel said to Matt as he entered, "but you'll have to wait outside."

Matt looked from Benny Ray to the doctor and back again, then nodded and ducked out into the open space between the examination areas.  He was shaking.

A medic approached Shepherd.  "Sir, Captain Lawson said you'd asked about a shower?"

Matt nodded, his attention still focused on Benny Ray, but he couldn't make out anything that was being said behind the curtain.

"Sir, if you'd come with me, I'll show you where you can clean up."

A little frustrated, but not wanting to annoy the people who were taking care of his team, Matt sighed.  "Uh, yeah, okay," he agreed.  There was nothing he could do at the moment, and he was dirty, not to mention hungry.  He turned and followed the medic out of the ER, glancing back twice to where he knew Benny Ray lay.

 

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

 

Matt looked up from the meal he was eating in the hospital cafeteria.  He was showered, wearing a new set of surgical scrubs while his clothes were cleaned, and cleared for a return to duty by the captain who had examined him.  He didn’t bother to tell the red-haired woman that he wasn't officially in the military anymore.  But it was Benny Ray's pale face, just before he'd passed out, that kept haunting his thoughts.  Why the hell hadn't someone showed up to tell him what was going on?

He looked up when he heard someone else enter the nearly deserted room.  Maybe Margo knew something.

"So, they cut you loose, too, huh?" he asked when she reached his table.

Margo nodded.  She was also dressed in green scrubs and white slippers.  "Yeah, I'm fine.  Any news on Benny Ray and Chance?"

"No, not yet.  I was hoping they'd told you something," he said, his smile disappearing.  "Did you see C.J.?"

"No, but I could hear him talking up a storm when I left.  He was still with a doctor.  That looks pretty good," she said, nodding at the thick slice of hot roast beef Matt was working on, complete with mashed potatoes, string beans, a biscuit, and a cup of steaming coffee.

"It is," Matt said, realizing for the first time what the food tasted like.  "Why don't you go get some?"

She nodded, heading off to the serving line.  She carried her tray back and sat down across from Matt, immediately digging in.  They ate in silence.

When they were both done, Matt stood and picked up both their trays.  "I'll go get rid of these," he said.

"Thanks," she replied, "want some more coffee?"

"Sure," he replied.  "And a slice of that apple pie I saw, if they have any left."

"I doubt it'll be a problem this time of night," she said as she stood and headed back to the serving line.  She returned a few minutes later with two slices of pie and two full cups of coffee.

"Think they'll be okay?" she asked when she was half-finished.

Matt shrugged.  "I hope so."

"I thought Benny Ray just hurt his ankle."

"Took a couple of shots to the vest at close range," Matt told her.

"Ouch."

"Yeah," he replied, the bruises immediately springing to mind.

They had just finished their desserts when a young man dressed in hospital whites walked over to join them.  "Excuse me, are you Major Shepherd?"

"Yeah," Matt said, starting to stand, but the man waved at him to stay seated.

"I just wanted to let you know that Mr. Walker and Mr. Riddle are on their way up to their room – we thought we might as well put them in the same one.  You're free to go see them as soon as you're done."

"What's the room number?" Matt asked.

"207.  Take a left out of the elevators.  It's almost at the end of the hall."

"Thank you, Sergeant," Matt replied.  "What about Mr. Yates?"

"I'm not sure, sir.  Sorry.  You can check with Captain Lawson in the ER.  She's the doctor of record tonight.  She can find out for you."  The man turned and left them to finish their coffee, which they quickly did, then they headed straight for the elevators.

 

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

 

Both Chance and Benny Ray were sitting in their beds, working on a meal of their own when Matt and Margo walked in.

"Best hospital food I've ever had," the sniper commented before he speared another bite of the roast beef.

Chance nodded, his mouth full.  He washed the bite down with some coffee, then added, "But damn I'm glad we won’t be here to enjoy it for very long."

"They're not keeping you?" Matt asked the pair, his tone clearly doubtful.

"Twenty-four hours," Benny Ray said.

Chance looked at the sniper, then shook his head.  "Twenty-four?  I heard the doctor say forty-eight."

"Don't know 'bout you, man, but I don't plan on stayin' here for two days.  I'm fine."

"Which is why you passed out," Matt said, folding his arms across his chest and giving his second-in-command a challenging look.

Margo shot Matt a concerned look, then glanced back to Benny Ray, her eyebrows raised in curiosity.

"Hell, sir, that was–"

"Delayed shock," Chance interrupted.  "I heard the doctor talking to the PA who treated me just before they brought him into the room."

"Which is why I have this damned needle stuck in me," Benny Ray said, holding up one arm to show them where an IV needle was taped to the back of his hand.

"And why they want to keep you for two days," Margo added, offering the man an understanding smile.

Benny Ray didn't bite.  "Feel fine," he argued.

Matt leveled both injured men with a command glower.  "You'll _both_ stay as long as the doctors want to keep you," he told them.

They both rolled their eyes, but there was no argument from either man.  They knew that, when it came right down to it, they'd lose.  Besides, there was no reason to take chances with their health, or their bodies, but that didn't mean they looked forward to an extended stay at an Air Force hospital.

Margo yawned.  "Excuse me," she apologized.

Matt took in the tired expressions.  "Okay, look, you two finish up and get some sleep.  I'm going to go see if I can find C.J. and someplace for us to grab some shut-eye.  We'll check back in the morning."

"Hell, sir, it's morning now," Benny Ray grinned.

"Later this morning," Matt half-growled.  "And I better not hear either of you went AWOL."

"We'll be here, Major," Chance assured.

Benny Ray nodded.

"Goodnight," Margo told them, leading the way out.

 

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

 

Once Matt knew that C.J. had asked to speak to someone in mental health, he let his questions slide, asking instead where he and Margo might get some sleep.  They were promptly driven to the visiting officers' quarters and provided a room.  The A1C who drove them opened the trunk of the car and handed them two plastic bags with their clean clothes in them, then bid them goodnight.

Matt opened the door and found the light switch.  The quarters were clean and tidy.  Two bedrooms opened off the living room area, which was compete with a mini-kitchen along one wall.  He and Margo each took one of the rooms, heading immediately to the waiting beds.

 

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

 

          Lying in the darkness, Matt listened to the sound of his own breathing, but it was memories and images of Benny Ray that filled his thoughts – the sniper appearing out of nowhere to save him and C.J.…  The pain etched onto the man's face…  Benny Ray's comment in the chopper, trying to set him at ease…  The sniper sitting on the examination table, almost naked…

          Matt held that thought.  He'd seen Benny Ray nearly naked before…  In swim trunks…  In shorts when they ran on the beach, or played volleyball…  In briefs in the locker room at the gym, or shuffling down the hall at the Silver Star, on his way to the single working bathroom, back before Matt had finished renovating the suites.

          Without thinking, Matt reached down and cupped himself.  He was well on his way to getting hard.  Concentrating, he could easily recall the way the sniper's muscles looked, the way they moved under his sun-bronzed skin.

He caressed himself through his cotton briefs, remembering the way Benny Ray's nipples puckered into hard nubs, pushing through the light brown hair that covered the man's chest, invitations to be enjoyed.

          Reaching into his briefs, Matt pulled his erect cock out, the sensitive head rubbing along the sheet.  He squeezed himself, picturing himself running his hands over the sniper's chest, the hair tickling his palms… rolling the twin hard nubs between his fingers and thumbs… the taste of the man's skin as he kissed and tongued his way down his belly, following the promise offered by the slightly thicker hair that plunged toward his groin.

          Precome leaked from the head of Matt's throbbing cock and he used it to slick his hand, beginning to stroke himself in earnest, squeezing and pulling with one hand, his other going to his balls, playing with himself.

          What would Benny Ray's cock look like? Matt wondered.  If he could reach out and pull those briefs down, what would he find?

He imagined the sniper's dick would be long and thick, a weapon, just like the rest of the man, lancing straight out from his body, with no curve, no angle, just an undeniable command for attention.

          Matt pictured Benny Ray, lying on his back, his cock rising straight up out of a tangle of dense, dark brown hair, the veins full, the head a deep red-purple, shaped for penetration, begging for his attention.  And he'd be more than happy to give it his full attention…

His fingers curled around his own crown, squeezing, more precome leaking from his slit.

          What would he do with that cock?  He knew what he wanted to do to it.  He like to lean over, one hand wrapping around the thick base while he gently kissed the tip, savoring the taste of the man like a wine snob would sample a glass of his favorite vintage.  Then his tongue would dart out, pressing against the small slit, tempting, encouraging before he opened his mouth and took Benny Ray.

          The sniper would moan softly as he used his tongue to lave the sensitive under-side of the man's crown.  Then, slowly, he would explore each and every contour as Benny Ray began to leak, filling his mouth with a new taste to be enjoyed, savored, and remembered…

          Matt pulled harder, faster on himself as he imagined trying to take all of the sniper's cock into his mouth, the head mashing against the back of his throat as he tried to consume the man.

He could clearly picture Benny Ray starting to pump into his mouth, forcing himself deeper.  And Matt would use his tongue, his teeth, his mouth, making love to the man he'd wanted for so long.

          The sniper's hips would begin to buck harder, faster as he lost control, surrendering to the pleasure Matt was giving him, his legs falling open, his balls sucking up tight to the base of his cock.  And he'd squeeze those balls, making the man's hips pump even harder, sending the thickening cock down Matt's throat.

          Benny Ray would start to sweat, the moisture making his skin shine, and Matt would use some of that to slick his finger, slide it along that sensitive expanse of skin between the sniper's sac and his hidden tight pucker, press against the virgin opening, making the sniper cry out with unexpected pleasure and lust.

          Matt slowed his hand, willing his pending organism to wait a little longer as he imagined himself raising his head, Benny Ray's cock sliding free of his mouth.

          "Do you want me?" he heard himself ask the sniper.

          "Yes," was the moaned response, the sniper pressing his hips up…

          Matt pictured himself, moving in-between the man's legs, then lifting them, placing them over his shoulders so when he finally entered the sniper he'd be able to watch the man's expression.

Benny Ray's cock bounced across Matt's lower belly as he leaned over, his lubed finger pressing against the man's unexplored opening again.  The ring of muscle suckled his finger as he slowly pressed his way into the tight, hot passage.

          Benny Ray's head rolled from side to side, his eyes squeezed shut as adjusted to the new sensation, clearly enjoying it.  Matt carefully added a second finger, opening and stretching the man as the sniper pressed his hips down, trying to force the intruding digits in deeper.

When he was trying to ride his fingers, Matt pulled them out and grabbed his own hard, demanding, lube-covered cock, positioning himself against the man's opening.

"Do it," Benny Ray begged.

Using all the control he had, Matt pressed forward, the head of his cock popping inside the sniper.  Both of them gasped as the first waves of intense pleasure threatened to send them over the edge, then and there.  But they waited for a moment, the danger passing.

Matt slowly pressed in deeper, refusing to stop a second time until he was completely buried in Benny Ray's ass.  The sniper panted, his fingers curled into the blankets to keep himself from reaching for his own cock.

"Matt," he moaned softly, begging the man to fuck him…

Matt pumped himself with a tight fist as he imagined how it would feel to dive again and again into the sniper's impossibly tight, flame-hot passage.  He'd grab the man's feet, rocking him higher onto his shoulders so he could thrust in deeper.

Watching Benny Ray writhe under him, taking him, peaked Matt's passion.  He pounded into the man, his gaze shifting between the sniper's face and his bouncing cock.

When Benny Ray started shooting, long strands of come fired against Shepherd's chest, Matt lost what little control he had left, sinking himself one last time before he started to come himself, filling the man's guts with surge after surge…

Matt gasped, feeling the first wave of come rushing up to explode into his hand as he continued to pull and squeeze himself.  He grunted softly, milking himself until he had no more to give.

The images of Benny Ray and him together slowly began to fade from his thoughts as he lay still until he caught his breath again, his eyes closed, tenaciously clinging to the last dream-like imaginings:  he and Benny Ray curled together to sleep, their bodies satisfied, their hearts full.

As that picture finally faded, he opened his eyes, then cursed softly.  He'd made one helluva a mess of the top sheet.  Getting up, he pulled that off, using it to wipe himself off, then tossed it onto the floor.  He climbed back into bed, pulling up the covers and curled onto his side, willing himself to sleep.

As he waited for exhaustion to carry him into sleep, he faced a disturbing truth: he loved Benny Ray.  He'd known that he wanted the man since the first time they'd met, but it had been easy to ignore back then – the man was happily married.  But now…  Now he was divorced, single again, and he hadn't been dating.

Desire had slowly grown into passion, lust, and finally to love as he got to know the man better than he'd ever expected to.  But how the hell could he ever say so?  Matt just couldn't imagine the sniper ever returning the feelings.  So he kept his mouth shut and jerked off to various well-rehearsed fantasies.

But he'd almost lost the man today… yesterday, he automatically corrected himself.  The important point being that he'd come so close to losing the sniper.  Too close.

The images of the bruises returned, followed quickly by Benny Ray's pale face just before his eyes rolled up and he'd passed out.  Then the feel of the sniper in his arms…

Matt rolled over and closed his eyes again.  He was going to have to tell him, sooner or later.  He couldn't go on like this.  But what the hell would he do if Benny Ray rejected him?  What if he decided to leave the team?

No, he simply couldn't risk sharing the truth.  He'd just have to make do with his fantasies and the one-night stands he'd become famous for.

With a tired sigh, he sank into a dreamless sleep.

 

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

 

Three days later they were back in Hermosa Beach.  Matt ordered some much-needed down-time.  Margo immediately headed out for a trip up the coast – for some time alone.  Chance said he planned to spend the time working on the German and getting some things done around the hanger and loft that he'd been putting off.  C.J. was quick to offer his help, and the handsome black pilot took him up on it equally fast.

Benny Ray had nowhere to go and nothing in particular to do.  He stayed at the Silver Star, like usual, enjoying long days lying on the sand or fishing from the pier as he healed.  He also enjoyed the company, Matt hanging around more than usual, sunning with him, fishing, both of them doing some light work on the old hotel.  And, at night, Benny Ray enjoyed the massages Matt said the doctor had suggested to help the bruising clear quicker.

The major's touch was strangely arousing and comforting at the same time, and the sniper was careful not to let his reaction show.  There were a few times, as Matt worked over him, that he could have sworn that the man leaned over and lightly kissed him on the head, the shoulder.  But that was impossible.  The sensations had to be a side-effect of the pain medication and the muscle relaxants.

Too bad, he thought as he looked forward to another evening of massage.  But given Matt's interest in the ladies, there was no way he could be interested in the sniper.  So Benny Ray decided he'd be content with the welcome touch for as long as it lasted and jerk off to his own fantasies when he was alone.  It was too bad that he was too afraid to tell Matt how he felt, but it was too big a risk.  Maybe someday.  Maybe…


End file.
